Friday, December 31
Thursday, December 30
SO there it is my NYR to not try so hard.
Wednesday, December 8
Yes the snow came. We tried o see f we could change one of our seminars to be 'God has made us as white as snow... Discuss?' Not sure this went down to well with the tutor!
We did however still gather as a community, albeit a smaller community for safety, to celebrate the Lord, and to share together in fellowship in sung worship, prayer and testimony. It was really great to gather and draw into to share.
And its crazy. I shared this with everyone:
I live in a community that when you start here I was often bowled away by its beauty but after a while and the closer you get to deadline you kind of forget and this week God has just brought me back to him and the knowledge of his power, his beauty. God completely reminded me of how much in control he could be and how much he could do and this was just to the land scape. I know that God loves me greatly so if he did this earth what is he doing in my life, how is he changing me into this new and beautiful creation. Whats more I already know I live in an amazing community, so i can't wait to see what he's changing them into.
And now as it freezes it turns into glitter.
I had housegroup christmas meal on tuesday night. It was great cause we were like a family, right to the weird uncle. This is what Gods community is. covered in glitter. Not down to us but down to God and he truly makes us beautiful white (and glittery.)
"Come now, let us reason together, says the LORD: though your sins are like scarlet,
they shall be as white as snow;
though they are red like crimson,
they shall become like wool.
Tuesday, November 9
Thursday, October 28
At the beginning of our year at college as part of our quiet day we had read to us allowed a Gospel in 2 or so hours. It was an amazingly powerful things to do. Listen as a community to the Good Good News of Christ in the form of the Gospel on Mark.
When in a lecture the other day a tutor said to the class this:
Tuesday, October 19
Monday, October 18
I wish to serve God and feel I have a calling to ministry. How does this engage with some of the biblical texts that get thrown at us. The struggle I feel is not with my college friends who feel that women should not be with a role of leadership within the church but rather how do you react to those who wish to put these biblical points out to you either as a hinderance or out of pure wishing to understand.
Is my calling and sense of calling belittled by the passages in Timothy and Corinthians?
Although, I will still go and with God's will do what I feel called to wether as a minister and maybe a minister to the armed forces. I think for now its going to be a long struggle to understand deeply the connections and the deep understanding and meaning in these passages. Look like its time for some prayer.
Sunday, September 12
Tuesday, August 24
Sunday, August 22
Its not the its the end point?
Its never the start!
We race towards the goal, but we walk along a narrow path. We all started somewhere.
Start fragment. End together. Journey... still being undertaken.
People please bare with me, we all started at different places all on different paths going to one goal. My map might not read the same as yours.
Friday, August 13
Wednesday, July 14
The Fellowship of the Believers
Tuesday, July 13
It really does make a great prayer.
It is my prayer today.
It is such a simple song with so much impact and meaning and truth in its words. It's reminder of what God requires and wish from me, what I wish to give to him, the command and the reasons of what power he holds on me, through the death of his Son. I lay my heart before the Lord and ask his Spirit to live within me, his flame, his passion, his love, until I return home.
These moments and memories,
Caught, captured, still.
Lively and beautiful,
Crazy and sad.
They tell a story,
One that no one else can know fully
Glimpses of individuals,
Journeys, paths, parties.
Celebrations of a moment.
I keep looking at these photos.
Sunday, July 11
For the word of the LORD is upright, and all his work is done in faithfulness.
Saturday, July 10
Sunday, June 27
Thursday, June 10
Monday, June 7
Monday, May 10
Tuesday, April 27
Sunday, April 25
Wednesday, April 14
Sunday, March 28
Challenge... I was scared and worried about what I would have to face, the things we would have to do, London, the team the people, it was all a challenege, but God is a God of Challenges.
Thos evening however I have helped host a quiz night. It wasn't huge and it wasn't greatly significant but it was family. Family all together, enjoying, having fun.
I was with the people who have helped me grow, learn, experience and enjoy the last nine days. These are the people who although worried and scared of coming on mission have taught me not to fear as I have an amazing God and amazing friends.
Where next, well we will get past church tomorrow, have lunch and travel home and see what awaits me for my next steps
To the glory of your name
I bring to you my life in praise.
How can you accept us?
I’ve seen the work our hands have done
Crazy shameful moments
Time wasters, life suckers
Middle class mums
And high class dads
Working class aunts
And vagabond uncles.
Brothers and sisters lost and in pain
Wandering feet and wandering spirits
Life with incredible limits.
Boundaries and walls
I can’t imagine how they can fall
How can your inexhaustible love
infiltrate into this pollution
into a world where you can be moving
yet few see you
and fewer seek you
Such disunity and helplessness
But Lord I have seen your people
Connected, praying, loving
I have seen their passion for you
Their love for your people
Who have answered your call
And stayed true to your word and work
I have seen hearts break with love for these people
And I have seen hearts mended here
I have seen people walk in humility
Walking ever closer to you
They have their eyes on the goal
And are solid in their foundations
Based upon the one true Cornerstone
They are a living for you Lord
And you supply and bless
To the glory of your name
I bring to you my life in praise.
Friday, March 26
Chatting to people
Trying to be help
More standing in the way
It was a taken opportunity.
I have been blown away by people in this place, not just the people of Newham but the team I am a part of. They're still there encouraging me when deep inside I've fallen asleep and I'm ready really to give up.
Oh and today I did some knitting :)
Thursday, March 25
Wednesday, March 24
Also the lent group this evening where amazing and so willing to ask questions.
Yet tonight I have started to reflect upon the willingness to do things. Are we willing to drop everything and go and do God's bidding at the shortest notices, least of all with little preparation or expectancy?
On this mission I think that is something I am being called to consider as a lot of what we do turn up and see, and do what is needed then and their, being prepared to get stuck in, and just being willing and open to being used. As well as agreeing to assemblies less than 24 hours before hand.
I really pray that God opens my heart and my head to being this willing and just going with his flow more than trying to confine and constrict his amazing power and plans.
Tuesday, March 23
The place of Newham where I'm on mission, just keeps on giving and giving. Not just new experiences and food, but its generosity for life, its love for the people and the passion for God is really hard to comprehend. Let alone get you head around. I've seen God in some strange places, but Newham has really blessed me as God isn't just in strange places, he just is and that is so profoundly obvious.
We looked around a warehouse today with first fruits, and the guys who's behind just has given so much to this area, and he quickly introduced us to his manager for Aspire (a clothing recycle plant type collection thing) who told us about Aspire, and at the end he turned around and said I know some of you will probably looking for jobs soon and theirs just around the corner this opportunity. To me it just showed the willingness to help welcome and supply to all the needs of all they meet.
If I have been so blown away in the first five days of Mission to which I was terrified and apprehensive and kinda willing to do, then what has got planned for the rest of the week to make me more aware of him in this place as the tiredness sets in?
On this note I shared with the Lady who cooked tea for us this evening about how I really hadn't been sure about this Mission and how in some ways I really wanted to escape it and run away, and some time later she said very quietly to me "I'm glad you came," and so am I. It might not be easy but its all about being Christian everyday.
Monday, March 22
Tomorrow is a new day in Newham, and I might have slept.
Sunday, March 21
How can this be made into any form of understanding in my head?
How does this fit into the stereotypes that where put forward as suggestion to what we could be greeted by? How does this fit into the difficulty I thought I had but rather, my difficulty is not struggling with God in the sense of seeing him in the people here, but rather its overwhelming in a sense, yet even then these terms aren't the right way to describe this.
Knowing that I know not a lot, how do I move on to help serve this community in the next seven days?
Moreover, how do I take this experience and serve God with this in every situation I meet?
Saturday, March 20
It threw up some interesting questions. As part of the challenge we bought a head scarf and I wore it as part of the experience, and walking through the street I was stopped by what I believe was a Muslim women dressed with a head scarf who stopped and asked me for money and said 'sister pray for me'. I was unsure of how to respond to this situation. Some how I don't think they would have asked me if I wasn't wearing a head dress.
This evening was Newhams got talent. And they really have. It was great to see the energy supplied by young and old people.
Friday, March 19
Thursday, March 18
- I have had great support of many brilliant people in varying ways, all of which I needed.
- My personal prayer life has increased greatly
For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline.
2 Timothy 1: 6-7
Friday, March 5
Saturday, February 13
different |ˈdif(ə)rənt|adjective1 not the same as another or each other; unlike in nature, form, or quality : you can play this game in different ways. | (different from/than) the car is different from anything else on the market.• informal novel and unusual : try something deliciously different.
Friday, February 12
Sunday, February 7
Its odd, the word cost has come up so much in the last few days. What is the cost of being here, doing this? What is the cost of being a Christian; of being a disciple; of being an apprentice? What is the cost of being a pioneer, of using practical theology, of really caring? What is the cost of my heart, of my emotions, of myself? What am I willing to give up? What will others give up? What did He give up?
The word cost in itself is often painful. Sometimes a cost can be joyful, but more often than not, it is a heart wrenching pain. I was about yesterday in the realms of Derbyshire.
Why has God brought me here? Usually even though I am still unsure I know its right, but today, not so in any case.
God why am I here?
So many people are questioning things, and asking why life is complicated. I can see so clearly the cost they have had in their lives.
One seems so much in pain from emotions that they seem to want to disappear. Why? Why can I see the cost of their feelings, causing them to hate what they think they need to do, the place where they need to be? ‘why is life so complicated?’
Another was confused by a proposal, a decision that was wanted, do I do this, do I do that? Do I stick with this place, or do I possibly fast track three, four maybe five years down the line to where I want to be. ‘why is God ruining my life, why is life so complicated?’
One more had lost what they saw as their future. They where questioning what to do now. Confused. ‘Why is life so complicated, why?’
... what is my cost in this life time, why am I here?
Once again I found myself brought to the floor of your chapel Lord. I'm face down in confusion, not just for me but for everyone, but I will continue to shout your praise because You are my God forever
Friday, February 5
Wednesday, January 27
Here we are Lord
You bring us here
You have given us purpose
You gave us a teacher
Who showed us how
But what can we do now
I see so much wrong in this world
I just cant understand
And on occasion Lord
I’m not just sad but I’m also mad
It becomes hard to see you
Harder to lean on you
Harder to serve you
It becomes tiring
So tiring Lord
I stumble weary along this road
My light growing dim
Sunday, January 17
Friday, January 15
Tuesday, January 12
- first drive on a motorway
- first summer camp as a leader
- first drink in a pub
- first game of poole
- first crash
- first battle of the bands
- first amazon order with my own money
- first car gone
- first disaster on a motorway
- consequently first sermon